Things My Mom Did for Me That Benefit Me as a Person

Moms are the best. Especially mine. Yes, everyone says that, and I'm not going to try and tell you that mine is better than yours. Your mom is probably amazing. If she's still with you tell her that I commend her on raising a good human. Unless you're a murderer or something. In that case, shame on you. You probably really let your mom down. I will say that my mom was the best mother for me. Here are a handful of the things that I think she got super right. If you yourself are a parent, consider adding them to your repertoire.

1. She read to me.

And she read with me. And she carted me or walked with me or let me walk to the library. A lot. And books/literature are still a topic of conversation that we keep up. I think that reading has made me a more empathetic human person and more open-minded. I grew up in a very small town. Literature was a way to expand my horizons and at least get an inkling that other people live differently or just experience life differently than I do. To this day, I tend to have some firm opinions, but I know that they are just that: opinions. Good for me, not for everybody. These are skills that I learned both from her and in living experiences that weren't mine.

2. She didn't talk shit about bodies.

Other people's OR hers. And she didn't tolerate a ton of self-loathing from my sister and me. Light joking was always acceptable, but I don't think I ever completely got mired down in the teenage self-loathing like I might have if I hadn't had a mom who loved her body and spoke positively of mine. And let's be honest, body shaming is gross and we shouldn't do it. Unless you are someone's physician, you are in no position to comment on their weight.

3. She walked with me.

I am a walking fiend. I do some good thinking when I'm walking and I think it comes from animated family discussions that we had while taking a leisurely stroll or (if Dad was with us), struggling to keep up with him because for some reason he sped up when he went uphill. What a maniac. Those were good times with my people and I appreciate that both parents got me started on that.

4. She was always creative.

My mom worked a lot. A job, school work, a teaching job, house work, church work, yard work and raising two kids. But she also made us clothes or sewed toys or did art projects or drew illustrations for us or sang/played an instrument. It is super easy to get overwhelmed and decide that you're too busy for something essential, but if you are stimulated by creativity, you always need to make that time for yourself. Otherwise you'll just end up more overwhelmed and miserable.

5. She made and kept close friends for a long, long time.

Mom is definitely more social than I am, though she was never a social butterfly. But like she does, I boast some of the same flipping excellent friends that I made in grade school. She made checking up on people and staying in touch a priority, so she never lost contact with people. She's always been a considerate friend and quick to offer help with a problem. Today when I was talking about a film project that I'm working on the first question she had was "How else can I help?" Now that I am at an age where I can be friends with Mom, I hope I can be a friend LIKE Mom (hey, friends, I love you guys, too!).

Here's to my Mom and here's to yours.

Bonus Dad picture because good partners make good Mothering easier.

(Note: usually the pictures that I use in a post will be my own, but I can't find my memory card with most of my mom photos so these were stolen from my sister Forrest, my Aunt Lisa, my Uncle Donny and my stepfather Anthony. Just wanted credit where credit is due)